27 Hijaabs

You know that movie, with Heidi Keigl 27 Dresses. Where she is a perpetual bridesmaid; the ever helpful friend, who has excellent organisational skills, saving her friends weddings from any major meltdowns, and forced to don the most god awful dresses to her friends nuptials. She reminds me of myself a lot. Except she is taller, hotter, and thinner than me. Anyway, I have attended loads of friends weddings, and I mean loads, and of course as you get older and network more you make more friends etc, the circle just gets bigger. It’s not a bad thing per se, I enjoy most weddings, I like helping out if I can, I genuinely will do anything I possibly can in order to make someones day go better. It’s nice to be nice, and it’s fun too. Apart from when you get the constant questions about why you arent married yet? Smartarse replies only get you so far…Anyway, I’m fairly creative and have helped with hall decor, stage settings, flower arranging etc. A while ago, I had helped do up a family friends wedding bedroom, for him and his new bride ( it was a typical boys room, so I spend a good few days painting, and draping and accessorising) I also did his brother’s bedroom, and about 3 weeks after that I received a call from a guy, his sister was getting married the next day, and I’m not sure what exactly happened but there seemed to be some problem with the stage setting, due to a mistake they weren’t going to have one from the organisers. I hadn’t been invited to this wedding, not that it was an issue anyway, I’m all for Asians to have small functions…her brother rang me and said he had heard about my ‘skills’, he really laid it on thick. Could I put together a backdrop for his sister. I explained that unfortunately, I wasn’t feeling well and up to it, could I do anything else? and I could offer a number of a wedding event company who may have been able to help out seeing as it was an emergency. The guy on the phone said ‘You’re just jealous it’s not your wedding, that’s why you want to ruin my sisters big day’. After about a second, which seemed like an eternity, I replied ‘If you must know, I’m on my period and bleeding like a stuck pig’. He hung up. I really wanted to be the one to hang up.

Seriously. WTF?. Do a persons worst qualities come out when they are desperate? or a case of the truth always comes out no matter what…one cannot hide their emotions? I was pretty upset by that, I have seen countless people get married, people waaaay younger than me, and by Allah I have never borne any ill feeling toward anybody. If I say I’m happy, then I really mean it, I’m too old to play games and massage egos.

I suppose I could say he’s a young man, mid to late twenties, he spoke without thinking. I’m not bothered anymore, I hope he gets fat really quickly.

Age, however doesn’t bring maturity, or give us the right to mouth off whatever we want.

One of our family friends got their son married to a local girl. She seems nice, her Mum seems nice, always says the right Allah words, you know Alhamdolillah, Mashallah, Barakallah… So after we had met this girls Mum a few times at social functions, my Mum thought it would be nice to invite her to our massive kick ass iftaar party. This Auntie Jee, is also looking for a girl for her son, and she has asked my Mum to keep an eye out, and to recommend any potential girls, with the stipulation that she must be a pharmacist *rolls eyes* because you know her son is one, and like for like etc. So my Mum suggested my second cousin, who is a pharmacist, lets call her A. My Mum said she would speak to A’s Mother, and pass on numbers if need be. Numbers were swopped, and my cousin said no. She said she wants somebody tall, as he is 5’7″, and she is 5’5″ and wants to be able to wear heels. Fair enough I say, it’s her prerogative to choose to reject whomsoever she wishes to on whatever reason. Except F’s Mum doesn’t really like this, she keeps ringing our house, asking my Mum to have a word, she rings my cousins house asking if they can come round. Around that time my Dad’s Uncle was seriously ill, so my Aunt explained that as they were busy perhaps later, and she would speak to her daughter again. A. was adamant that she wasn’t interested, and that there was no point them coming because she wasn’t ever going to agree. So this woman is ringing us,  and my Aunt, and even the day before the funeral, and my Aunt said to her ‘There is no point you coming as we don’t want to waste your time, my daughter isn’t interested, and we aren’t going to force her to see somebody she clearly doesn’t want to marry. I wish you all the best. Inshallah you will find a good match for your son’. To which F’s Mum replied ‘If you don’t sort out your attitude, and have a word with your daughter, then she will be left sitting at home like ********’s daughter who is still not married’. (that was me she was referring to)

My Aunt hung up on her, my Aunt and cousin told me what had happened, they daren’t tell my Mum for fear of upsetting her, and upset she will be…she cries enough as it is. So again, I’m left thinking…do people say the worst things in anger, or sheer desperation? or both? I mean, what have I or my family ever done to her, for her to make some bitchy remark like that? I’m not going to tell my Mum, and I’m not even sure if I should have a word with her? Sometimes people are a bit rubbish.

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~ by Honest Waffle on 11/10/2009.

One Response to “27 Hijaabs”

  1. Differences between real life and the movies; there’s no romance to complement the comedy and there’s no end to the small mindedness.

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